Advice for the full time Mums out there by Elder Faust in 1982

"Homemaking is whatever you make of it. Every day brings satisfaction along with some work which may be frustrating, routine, and unchallenging. But it is the same in the law office, the dispensary, the laboratory, or the store. There is, however, no more important job than homemaking. As C. S. Lewis said, “A housewife’s work … is the one for which all others exist.” ^...

Women today are encouraged by some to have it all: money, travel, marriage, motherhood, and separate careers in the world. For women, the important ingredients for happiness are to forge an identity, serve the Lord, get an education, develop your talents, serve your family, and if possible to have a family of your own.

However, you cannot do all these things well at the same time. You cannot eat all of the pastries in the baking shop at once. You will get a tummyache. You cannot be a 100-percent wife, a 100-percent mother, a 100-percent Church worker, a 100-percent career person, and a 100-percent public-service person at the same time. How can all of these roles be coordinated? I suggest that you can have it sequentially.

Sequentially is a big word meaning to do things one at a time at different times. The book of Ecclesiastes says: “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under … heaven.” ¹² There are ever-increasing demands on women that challenge their traditional role of caregivers. But as women, the roles of wife and mother are in the center of your souls and cry out to be satisfied. Most women naturally want to love and be loved by a good man and to respond to the God-given, deepest feelings of womanhood—those of mother and nurturer. Fortunately, most women do not have to track a career like a man does. They may fit more than one interest into the various seasons of life.

I would encourage you sisters to develop all of your gifts and talents to move forward the work of righteousness in the earth. I hope you acquire all of the knowledge you can. Become as skillful as you can, but not exclusively in new careers at the expense of the primary ones, or you may find that you have missed one of the great opportunities of your lives.

Sister Faust and I urged our daughters to get an education, not only to help them in their homemaking but also to prepare them to earn a living if that became necessary. Going to college or a vocational school is a wonderful experience, and the dollars, the effort, and the time prepare the student to have a marketable skill.

I cannot tell you young women what educational skills you should acquire. That is for each of you to decide. You have your agency. Each of you will have to work very hard to learn all you can and develop your talents. It is not easy to achieve anything really worthwhile. I want only to tell you what will bring you identity, value, and happiness as a person. I also challenge you to reach your potential, to become a person of great worth, to become a great woman. Because most of you have the examples of great women in your family, each of you has a model to emulate."

Becoming meek and lowly in heart by Pat holland, byu 1986

"President Ezra Taft Benson warns us that one of Satan’s greatest tools is pride, which can “cause a man or a woman to center so much attention on self that he or she becomes insensitive to their Creator or fellow beings” (“This Is a Day of Sacrifice,” Ensign, May 1979, p. 34).

Satan uses that very delicate line between self-confidence and pride to blind us. He can keep us so frenzied in our efforts to protect our self-esteem that we are blinded to the one quality that would assure it—true dependence upon the Lord.

The Lord reveals his secrets to the meek, for they are “easy to be entreated” (Alma 7:23). Indeed, I have come to realize that my own personal promptings from the Lord most often occur when I have been brought down into the depths of humility and suddenly feel a lot less confident in my own ability and much more dependent upon the Lord. He certainly uses my pain as his megaphone for an otherwise dull ear. I am beginning to see that the very experiences I would have chosen to run away from at the time have really been the major motivational turning points in my life. Perhaps this is the reason President Spencer W. Kimball, who achieved so much success through humility, said he worked on that challenge every single day of his life. He knew that if we were to achieve success in this life and eternal life in the world to come, we would need to become totally dependent upon the Lord.

When asked how to remain humble, President Kimball offered this formula:

First, you evaluate yourself. What am I? I am the circle. I am the hole in the doughnut. I would be nothing without the Lord. My breath, my brains, my hearing, my sight, my locomotion, my everything depends upon the Lord. That is the first step and then we pray, and pray often, and we will not get up from our knees until we have communicated. The line may be down; we may have let it fall to pieces, but I will not get up from my knees until I have established communication—if it is twenty minutes, if it is all night like Enos. . . . If it takes all day long, you stay on your knees until your unhumbleness has dissipated, until you feel the humble spirit and realize, “I could die this minute if it were not for the Lord’s good grace. I am dependent upon him—totally dependent upon him.” [TSWK pp. 233–34]

That kind of counsel may not sound like something Alex Keaton can handle, but perhaps the rest of us could give it a try.

It seems very clear to me that if we can have much more confidence in the presence of God, then we will not be nearly so dependent upon nor need the approval, the acceptance, and the admiration of men. And we remind young Alex what the Lord has promised in return, “I will pour out my Spirit upon you, and great shall be your blessing—yea, even more than if you should obtain treasures of earth” (D&C 19:38).

May I share with you the greatest testimony I have of this truth. I have silently watched over the years as the confidence in the young man who once tried to kiss me has turned from youthful courage to perfect faith and total dependence upon the Lord. He has always gone to the Lord for help, but never more than now—and never more than for you. And even though he is getting a bit lumpy, graying at the temples, and retaining more of his laugh wrinkles, his lowliness of heart makes him beautiful to me.

It is my prayer that we might have eyes that really see how pride can destroy our peace. And that our ears might really hear when he calls, “Learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls” (Matthew 11:29; emphasis added). Of that I bear testimony, in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen."

Happiness... The reward of righteousness - Elder Cook

This is taken from the 2014 byu womens conference address by Elder Cook

"the reward of happiness. The question raised here is, how do I provide enough advantages for my children to be happy and successful in life? Lucifer has created a counterfeit or illusion of happiness that is inconsistent with righteousness and will mislead us if we are not vigilant. Many of the problems across the world are occurring because the secular world has been pursuing an incorrect definition of happiness. We know from the Book of Mormon that this problem has existed throughout all generations. We also know the blessings that come from living the commandments. In King Benjamin’s marvelous address, he states, “I would desire that ye would consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. For behold, they are blessed in all things, both temporal and spiritual; and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven, that thereby they might dwell with God in a state of never-ending happiness. O remember, remember that these things are true; for the Lord God hath spoken it.”28

Over many years I’ve followed a research project that commenced in the 1940s. Initially there were 268 men in a premier university who were periodically studied over their entire lives. Later, additional groups were included as women became part of the study. The study covered approximately 70 years. The doctors had continuous interviews with these men and women. The goal of the original study was to find out as much as possible about success and happiness. The study showed that college entrance scores and grade averages did not predict either success or happiness in later life. One area where there was a high correlation was childhood family happiness. The successful, happy adult usually reported that their mother in particular verbally expressed love and affection and did not use severe discipline. Both parents were demonstratively affectionate with each other and available and accessible to their children, with whom they had warm and emotionally expressive relationships. The parents created a stable family environment and were believed to have respected the autonomy of their children.

A concluding book on the study, published in 2012, reports: “Many measures of success throughout life are predicted less reliably by early financial and social advantage than by a loved and loving childhood.”29 A warm childhood correlates with achievement more than intelligence, social class, or athleticism. The study also found that what goes right in childhood predicts the future far better than what goes wrong. The study as a whole indicates that even when there are significant challenges and some things go very wrong, most children are very resilient, and the trust that is built by loving relationships with parents, especially the mother, can result in lasting lifetime happiness.

What was interesting to me, but not surprising, was that the study was completely in line with what the scriptures and the Church have taught about the family. The emphasis the Church has made on family home evening, family prayer, expressions of love, family togetherness, and family traditions are the very kind of activities that the study indicated would produce happy, successful adults. While Nephi begins the Book of Mormon expressing gratitude for goodly parents, the real lesson to be learned is that we each determine what we will be so that our posterity can happily report that they were born of goodly parents.

Dear sisters, the most important thing you can do is to make sure your children and those you nurture know that you love them. Love is the key ingredient to happiness."

Sheri dew - byu womens conference - sweet above all that is sweet

I have just been blown away at this 2014 byu womens conference address on grace!  It is incredible!

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SWEET ABOVE ALL THAT IS SWEET

By Sheri L. Dew (BA ’77)

Through grace, the divine enabling power of Jesus Christ, we have equal access to all the blessings of heaven.

Not long ago I was assigned to speak to women on the subject of grace. A dear friend who knew I was wrestling with that message sent me an e-mail that I’m sure she meant to be helpful. She wrote: “Here is what I hope you cover in your talk: What is grace? How do I gain access to it? What difference does grace make in my life? Can it help me with loneliness, with overeating, with bad relationships, with weaknesses and temptations, with insecurity, with heartache and stress? Can it help me with my husband? Is grace always present, or do I have to do something to get it? Is it a feeling? How can I tell when grace is helping me? Okay, those are the questions I want you to answer.”

I responded with a one-liner: “Are you sure that’s all you want to know?”

Her e-mail led me to ask another friend what she wished she understood about grace. “To tell you the truth,” she said, “TV evangelists have wrecked that word for me. I almost feel disloyal to the restored gospel even talking about grace. I mean, do we believe in grace?”

I then asked a friend serving as a stake Relief Society president to ask her presidency what they wished the women in their stake understood about grace. This is a spectacular quartet of women who have logged decades of service. And yet, after a long discussion, they said, “We don’t think we know enough about grace to even know what to ask.”

The disturbing irony in all of these comments is that the central, most compelling, most life-changing message of all time is that Jesus Christ already triumphed over sin, death, hell, and every kind of misery. Surely there is nothing our Father is more eager for us to understand than the breathtaking scope of the Atonement of His Son and the power the Atonement makes available to us. Because the key to unlocking the power of covenant women and men is covenant women and men learning to unlock the power of Jesus Christ.

With this truth in mind, let’s consider four of my friend’s questions.

What Is Grace?

My father had many virtues. He served faithfully in the Church his entire life. I doubt he ever missed home teaching in 60 years, though his home teaching route was a 100-mile round-trip. My earliest testimony of priesthood power came from him. After his death, we heard story after story about his quiet generosity. And my father’s word was gold. But my dad had an Achilles’ heel—a temper he never conquered. We knew he loved us, but we often bore the brunt of his anger.

One afternoon a few days before he died, I was sitting at his bedside as he slept. Suddenly, I found myself asking the Lord to forgive him for years of angry outbursts. As I prayed something unexplainable happened to me. In an instant I felt decades of hurt simply fall away. The feeling was spiritual, but it was also tangible. I could remember his anger, but I couldn’t feel any of the pain. It was gone. It was “beauty for ashes” (Isa. 61:3). It was sweet.

That is grace. The amazing power of grace. No earthly remedy could have done for me what the Savior did in that moment. It was the redeeming power of Jesus Christ that prompted me to pray for my father and even gave me the words to say; and it was His healing power that healed a lifetime of wounds.

The scriptures explain what I experienced. In Lehi’s vision of the tree of life, most of those he saw either never entered onto the covenant path or they got lost somewhere along the way (see 1 Ne. 8:18, 23, 28). But one group held fast to the iron rod, pressed forward to the tree and partook of the fruit, and heeded not those who mocked them (see 1 Ne. 8:30, 33–34). The fruit made them happy and filled their souls with “exceedingly great joy” (1 Ne. 8:12). It was “sweet above all that is sweet” (Alma 32:42).

What is this fruit that Nephi said was “most desirable above all things” (1 Ne. 11:22; emphasis added)? The fruit is the Atonement, which is the most tangible evidence of the Lord’s incomprehensible love for us. Grace is the power that flows from the Atonement and is how the Savior continues to manifest His love for us. The Bible Dictionary says that grace is “divine means of help or strength, given through the bounteous . . . love of Jesus Christ . . . . [G]race is an enabling power.”¹ The Savior empowers us with His grace not because we’ve earned it, but because He loves us perfectly. That is why grace is sweet. It was grace that I experienced at my father’s bedside.

I’ve never really liked the word sweet. I love things that taste sweet, unfortunately. But the word sweet has always seemed a bit insipid. When I was a student at BYU, being called a “sweet spirit” wasn’t necessarily a compliment. But I have come to understand that when we feel unexplainable peace or hope, love or comfort, the Lord is manifesting His grace, and it is truly sweet.

Years ago, I heard a woman I admire as a student of the gospel say that when she saw the word grace in the scriptures, she substituted the word power. Her counsel helped me begin to make sense of many scriptures for the first time. When we talk about the grace of Jesus Christ, we are talking about His power—power that enables us to do things we simply could not do on our own.

The Savior has “all power” in heaven and on earth (see Matt. 28:18; Mosiah 4:9; D&C 93:17). He has power to cleanse, forgive, and redeem us; power to heal us of weakness, illness, and heartache; power to conquer Satan and overcome the flesh; power to work miracles; power to inspire and strengthen us; power to deliver us from circumstances we can’t escape ourselves; and power over death. When the Apostle Paul said, “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me” (Phil. 4:13), he was describing grace.

Grace is divine power that enables us to handle things we can’t figure out, can’t do, can’t overcome, or can’t manage on our own. We have access to this power because Jesus Christ, who was already a God, condescended to endure the bitterness of a fallen world and experience all physical and spiritual pain (see Heb. 4:15–16).

Elder David A. Bednar (BA ’76, MA ’77) explained that

the Savior has suffered not just for our sins and iniquities—but also for our physical pains and anguish, our weaknesses and shortcomings, our fears and frustrations, our disappointments and discouragement, our regrets and remorse, our despair and desperation, the injustices and the inequities we experience, and the emotional distresses that beset us.

There is no physical pain, no spiritual wound, no anguish of soul or heartache, no infirmity or weakness you or I ever confront in mortality that the Savior did not experience first.²

Because Jesus Christ atoned, His grace is available to us every minute of every hour of every day. It is this power that ultimately enables us to do what we came to earth to do. Grace is divine enabling power.

What Difference Can Grace Make in Our Lives?

One Saturday I worked all day trying to make a dent in a long list of looming deadlines before joining my family at the temple for a niece’s endowment. As I walked into the chapel and sat down, the tears started and would not stop. Exhaustion and the sheer fear of letting people down had me undone. I opened the scriptures and through tears read, “The Lord God showeth us our weakness that we may know that it is by his grace . . . that we have power to do these things” (Jacob 4:7; emphasis added).

What the Nephites in this verse had power to do was work miracles, and did I ever need a miracle! Because of the Nephites’ faith, they could command in the name of Jesus and the mountains and waves of the sea would obey them (Jacob 4:6). As I read these verses, my mind raced over countless times the Lord had helped me before, and I felt a surge of faith. For the first time in weeks, I felt peace. Peace from the Prince of Peace. It was sweet.

We all know what “overwhelmed” feels like. If there are times when you think, “I can’t handle my children or my checkbook or my illness or the urge to eat brownies at midnight or the lack of a husband or the lack of a good husband or a family who doesn’t appreciate me one more day,” you’re not alone. The Savior’s divine empathy is perfect, so He knows how to help us. He rarely moves the mountains that stand in front of us, but He always helps us climb them.

Because of Him you don’t have to confront grief or insecurity or an addiction alone. With His help, you can resist temptation. With His help, you can change, forgive those who’ve hurt you, and start over. With His help, your capacity and energy can increase. With His help, you can be happy again. The Savior promised, “My grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them” (Ether 12:27).

We are among the “weak things” the Savior is talking about. His grace can change our very nature and over time transform us from who we are into who we can become.

What difference can grace make in our lives? It can make all the difference!

How Does the Savior Make His Power Available to Us?

Elder Bruce R. McConkie said that “if it were not for the grace of God, there would be nothing—no creation, no fall, no mortal probation, no atonement, no redemption, no immortality, no eternal life. It is God’s grace that underlies all things [and] . . . that makes all things possible. Without it there would be nothing; with it there is everything.”³

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland (BA ’65, MA ’66) added this clarity: “Much of the miraculous help we find in the gospel is just that—a miracle from heaven, the power of divine priesthood, the attendance of angels administering to us through a very thin veil. These are gifts from God, manifestations of His grace.”⁴

Every divine gift and every spiritual privilege that gives us access to the power of heaven comes from Christ or through Christ or because of Christ. We owe everything to Him and our Father in Heaven, including the privileges of receiving the gift and power of the Holy Ghost; of receiving personal revelation and gifts of the Spirit; of being endowed in the temple with knowledge and priesthood power; of learning the “mysteries of the kingdom” (D&C 84:19); of having the Lord on our right and on our left and his angels round about us (D&C 84:88); of receiving all the blessings of the Atonement; and of receiving eternal life, “the greatest of all the gifts of God”(D&C 14:7). We owe every divine gift and all access to divine power to the grace of Jesus Christ.

No wonder Eliza R. Snow said that Latter-day Saint women “have greater and higher privileges than any other females upon the face of the earth.”⁵ I stand with Eliza on this. The grace of Jesus Christ gives us access to the Holy Ghost, to angels, and to countless gifts of the Spirit, just to name a few.⁶

But there is one privilege LDS women likely overlook—the privilege of having access to priesthood power.⁷ Too many of us think we don’t have this privilege. But that is not true. Women who have been endowed in the temple have as much access to priesthood power for their own lives as do ordained men.

Four key points underscore this truth: First, priesthood keys are the manner through which the Lord authorizes the use of and distributes His power—for both women and men.

Second, there are distinctions between priesthood keys, priesthood authority, and priesthood power. Priesthood keys are required to authorize ordinances, priesthood authority is required to perform ordinances, and priesthood power is available to all who worthily receive ordinances and keep the associated covenants.

Third, both men and women who serve under the direction of priesthood keys serve with divine authority.⁸ Elder Dallin H. Oaks (BS ’54) has explained: “We are not accustomed to speaking of women having the authority of the priesthood in their Church callings, but what other authority can it be? . . . Whoever functions in an office or calling received from one who holds priesthood keys exercises priesthood authority in performing her or his assigned duties.”⁹

And fourth, men and women have equal access to the Lord’s highest spiritual privileges. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the house of the Lord. Elder M. Russell Ballard declared that “when men and women go to the temple, they are both endowed with the same power, which by definition is priesthood power. . . . Access to the power and the blessings of the priesthood is available to all of God’s children.”¹⁰

Though women are not ordained to an office in the priesthood, in the temple we are endowed with priesthood power and with knowledge of how to use that power.

Women have other privileges as well. We aren’t required to be ordained to enter the house of the Lord and officiate in priesthood ordinances there, though men are. Further, when women serve in any capacity under the direction of those who hold priesthood keys, we have full access to the power that flows through those keys, just as men do. Covenant women never lack for divine authority.

Further still, God’s highest ordinances are available only to a man and woman together. In this single doctrinal provision, God indicates His respect for the distinctive but vitally interconnected roles of both men and women.

And finally, women have claim to all blessings that emanate from the priesthood. Again, from Elder McConkie: “Where spiritual things are concerned, as pertaining to all of the gifts of the Spirit, with reference to the receipt of revelation, the gaining of testimonies, and the seeing of visions, in all matters that pertain to godliness and holiness . . . —in all these things men and women stand in a position of absolute equality before the Lord.”¹¹

Most important, we live in the dispensation of the fulness of times, when no spiritual blessings are being withheld from the earth (see D&C 121:27–29). No women living anytime, anywhere have had greater access to divine power than we do. If we seek for a lifetime, we won’t plumb the depth of power and breadth of spiritual privileges the Lord has given us. Through His grace, He has made His highest spiritual privileges available to us. That is our doctrine. That is the truth.

What Must We Do to Gain Access to the Savior’s Power?

I recently visited Harvard and felt smarter just walking across campus. But later that day, I went to the Boston Temple, and the contrast between one of the world’s elite universities and the Lord’s house, which is the institution of highest learning, was striking. Elder Dallin H. Oaks said that “in contrast to the institutions of the world, which teach us to know something, the gospel of Jesus Christ challenges us to become something.”¹² Our access to divine power hinges upon who we are becoming.

I doubt we quote any scripture on grace more often than Nephi’s, that “it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do” (2 Ne. 25:23). Covenant LDS women have a tendency to zoom in on the “after all we can do” part of the grace-and-works equation, but this scripture is not about sequence, and it is not about feverishly working our way through an exhaustive list of good works. Jesus Christ is the only one to walk this earth and do all that could be done.

Doing all we can do is about the direction we’re headed and what kind of people we are becoming. Doing all we can do is all about discipleship.

At the heart of becoming disciples is doing what we promise to do every time we partake of the sacrament—which is to “always remember” the Lord (Moro. 4:3; 5:2). This means remembering Him when we choose what media we’re willing to expose our spirits to. It means remembering Him in how we spend our time and when choosing between a steady diet of pop culture and the word of God. It means remembering Him in the middle of conflict or when temptation looms. It means remembering Him when critics attack His Church and mock truth. It means remembering that we have taken His name upon us (see Mosiah 5:7).

None of us has mastered this, but it is our quest, because conversion to the Lord requires immersion in His gospel. If we constantly immerse ourselves in a fallen world, how far can we really expect to progress in this life? I am not suggesting that there aren’t fun and even inspiring opportunities all around us. I love ball games and four-wheelers and snow-shoeing and Broadway plays with the best of them. But mortality is a short-term proposition. None of us will stay here long. Doesn’t it make sense to devote as much energy as possible to things we can actually take with us?

Discipleship is not easy, but it is easier than not becoming a disciple. Paraphrasing President Howard W. Hunter, if our lives are centered on Christ, nothing can ever go permanently wrong. But if they’re not centered on Christ, nothing can ever go permanently right.¹³

As disciples we can ask for more energy, more revelation, more patience, more self-discipline, more hope, more love, more healing, more happiness. We can ask for miracles, for freedom from pain, and for the desire to forgive. We can ask for more faith and for help in becoming better disciples. And we can ask for angels to walk with us.

Not long ago I was assigned to make a sensitive presentation to a group of senior General Authorities—which is always a little nerve-racking. I prepared the best I could and sought the Lord’s help—even asking if angels could accompany me to the meeting. Things went better that day than I had expected—which should have tipped me off. As I walked back to my office thinking, “That went pretty well,” I had an immediate impression: “You don’t think you’re the one who did that, do you?” I realized instantly that the Lord had indeed sent help.

I can’t think of a single thing I’ve ever been asked to do that I’ve been equal to. But therein lies the beautiful intersection of grace and works. When disciples do their best, whatever that is at a given moment, the Lord magnifies them.

Doing all we can do is about becoming and behaving like true disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ. That is our part.

What one thing would you be willing to give up, starting today, to put the Savior even more at the center of your life? What one thing would you be willing to do, starting today, to unlock more of His power? The Savior’s grace is what will enable us to do what He is counting on us to do in the twilight of this great, culminating gospel dispensation.

The Lord is hastening His work, and we are right in the middle of the hastening (see D&C 88:73). I loved it when a sister opened a recent Relief Society meeting in Houston by praying, “We are grateful to live in this day, when we are preparing the world for the return of Jesus Christ.”

Think of it! The eyes and hopes of every previous dispensation are upon us. We have been chosen to help prepare the world for the Savior. Because this day is unlike any other, it is time for us to do things we have never done before. And that includes working harder than we’ve ever worked to unlock the Savior’s power. Because the key to unlocking the power of covenant women and men is covenant women and men learning to unlock the power of Jesus Christ.

I know how tangible the Lord’s power is. I was in my early 30s when an opportunity to marry evaporated overnight and the heartache plunged me into depression. One day a friend called to say she’d had an impression that a verse in Mosiah was just for me, and then she read the verse over the phone: “I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, . . . and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions” (Mosiah 24:14).

I’m sorry to say that I hung up feeling even more discouraged. As foolish as it sounds now, I wasn’t looking for the Lord to ease my burdens, I just wanted Him to send me my husband! I could not face being single one more day. I was sure that if I prayed and fasted and went to the temple enough, I could convince Him to bless me with this righteous desire. I wasn’t thinking about standing as a witness. I was far too preoccupied with myself—which is what happens when we try to lift our burdens alone.

Weeks stretched into a year, and with all of my praying and fasting and temple-going, I was still single and miserable. But then one day I noticed a verse in Luke where the Savior declares that He has come to heal the brokenhearted (see Luke 4:18). The word brokenheartedjumped out at me, because my heart was broken. I was still pondering that verse a few days later, when I found myself meeting with Elder Bruce C. Hafen (BA ’66) about a manuscript he’d written on the enabling power of the Atonement. I took that manuscript home and devoured every word. It opened my eyes to scriptures and divine promises I had never seen before: that the Lord would heal our wounded souls, that He had already taken our pains upon Him, and that He would succor us (see Alma 7: 11–12; Jacob 2:8). I realized that I didn’t know very much about the Savior, and it simply isn’t possible to be a disciple of someone you don’t know.

Fast-forward 30 years. In some respects, my life hasn’t changed much. But in other ways, everything is different. That painful episode was a vital turning point, because it launched me on a continuing quest to understand the Atonement and the power that flows from it. Life would have crushed me long ago if I hadn’t learned how to access the Savior’s power. He has carried me and healed my heart again and again.

Today I do stand as a witness that the Lord visits His people in their afflictions. Priesthood power is real. Angels are real, and they really do minister through a very thin veil. The Savior really is filled with healing, enabling power, and He can ease our burdens and strengthen us when we feel weaker than weak. The path of discipleship is actually the easiest path because the Lord’s love for us has no end—which is why the fruit of the tree is sweet above all that is sweet.

Jesus Christ is going to come again. Every knee is going to bow and every tongue confess that He is the Christ. I know these things are true. May we be determined to unlock His power to help us be the disciples we want to be.

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Feedback: Send comments on this article to magazine@byu.edu.

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This article is adapted from a BYU Women’s Conference address given May 1, 2014, by Sheri L. Dew, president and CEO of Deseret Book Company. The full text and video of the address are available at womensconference.byu.edu.

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Notes

1. Bible Dictionary, s.v. “grace,” p. 697; emphasis added.

2. David A. Bednar, “Bear Up Their Burdens with Ease,” Ensign, May 2014, pp. 89–90.

3. Bruce R. McConkie, A New Witness for the Articles of Faith, (Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1985), p. 149.

4. Jeffrey R. Holland, For Times of Trouble, (Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 2013), p. 45; see also Ps. 18:36 and 94:18–29.

5. “Great Indignation Meeting,” Deseret Evening News, Jan. 15, 1870, p. 2.

6. Elder Bruce R. McConkie taught that spiritual gifts “are infinite in number and endless in their manifestations because God himself is infinite and endless” (New Witness, p. 270).

7. Elder Bruce R. McConkie said that the “doctrine of the priesthood—unknown in the world and but little known even in the Church—cannot be learned out of the scriptures alone . . . . The doctrine of the priesthood is known only by personal revelation” (Bruce R. McConkie, “The Doctrine of the Priesthood,” Ensign, May 1982, p. 32).

8. See Sheri L. Dew, Women and the Priesthood (Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 2013), especially chapter 6.

9. Dallin H. Oaks, “The Keys and Authority of the Priesthood,” Ensign, May 2014, p. 51.

10. M. Russell Ballard, “Let Us Think Straight,” BYU Campus Education Week devotional address, Aug. 20, 2013 (available atspeeches.byu.edu); see also D&C 109:15, 22.

11. Bruce R. McConkie, “Our Sisters from the Beginning,” Ensign, January 1979, p. 61.

12. Dallin H. Oaks, “The Challenge to Become,” Ensign, November 2000, p. 32.

13. See Howard W. Hunter, “Fear Not, Little Flock,” BYU devotional address, March 14, 1989 (available at speeches.byu.edu).

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Copyright 2011 by Brigham Young University.

The lioness At The Gate - Julie B. Beck

"I have said lately that women are like lionesses at the gate of the home. Whatever happens in that home and family happens because she cares about it and it matters to her. She guards that gate, and things matter to that family if they matter to her. For example, if the lioness at the gate believes in the law of tithing, tithing will be paid in that family. If that family has a humble little portion of ten pesos coming in, that lioness will safeguard the one peso if tithing is important to her. If that lioness at the gate knows about renewing her baptismal covenants with God, she will be in sacrament meeting on Sunday, and she will prepare her children to be there. They will be washed, cleaned, combed, and taught about that meeting and what happens there. It isn’t a casual event, but it is serious to her, and it will be serious to them. The lioness at the gate ensures that temple worship is taken care of in the family. She encourages that participation. She cares about seeking after her ancestors. If the lioness at the gate knows about and understands missions, missionaries, and the mission of the house of Israel, she will prepare future missionaries to go out from that home. It is very difficult to get a lion cub away from a lioness who doesn’t believe in missions, but if the lioness believes in a mission, she will devote her life to preparing the cub to go out and serve the Lord. That’s how important she is. Service happens if she cares about it." 

Establishing Priorities by Julie B. Beck z(byu womens conf 2010)

Establishing Priorities 

"Years ago I began using a system that works for me, and maybe it will work for you. There was a time when I needed to prioritize, and in one of those sacred meetings between me and the Lord, He gave me three categories that I have worked from, and they have been a guide in my life. The categories are the essential things, the necessary things, and the nice-to-do things. I started writing those things down. I asked, “What has to go in the category of essential?” What things must be taken care of, and if I don’t take care of them, the blessings of eternal life won’t be mine nor will they be my family’s.

I wrote at the top of the essential list revelation. I have to be able to know the mind and will of God. Therefore, I have to do the things in my life that put me in a position to hear His voice. Reading the scriptures then became an essential for me because the scriptures contain the mind and will of God, and by reading and studying from them, I can hear His voice and receive His guidance in all aspects of my life. I came up with a simple rule that was easy for me to keep: Every day I will spend some time in the scriptures. The accumulative power and learning of that commitment has changed my life and helped me learn daily the mind and will of God.

Personal prayer took on new meaning when I knew that I needed to know the mind and will of God. I have taken a paper and pencil with me most of the time since then to my prayers. I don’t 

always receive an answer or instruction, but I am ready. I want to be ready to learn what the Lord would have me do in my day. Who needs my help? How can I increase my faith this day? How can I strengthen my family? What things do I need to correct in order to be worthy to receive His Spirit? He will tell me.

Taking time to ponder and fast with sincerity took on added meaning when I knew that revelation was an essential for me. Making covenants and keeping covenants is on the essential list. Going to sacrament meeting and repenting every week took on added meaning. Going to the temple and fulfilling that responsibility frequently became an essential. Sharing the gospel is something the Lord tells us is an essential, and we are charged as part of the house of Israel to share that message. I need to open my mouth and find ways to share and express my testimony. Service took on added meaning. The Lord said if you want eternal life, give all that you have and follow me.4 So those things went on my essentials list. The list wasn’t very long, but there were essential things that I could see to and make sure that they were taken care of.

On my necessary list, then, went some other things. I started thinking about my home and family and what was necessary to create an environment or climate where the Spirit of the Lord would be. There were some necessary things to take care of. Homemaking took on a new meaning for me. I wanted to make a home where the Spirit of the Lord was present. That meant that even mundane tasks like picking things up and cleaning, became necessary to keep a house of order. I wanted to model my house after the temple. Though that is the ideal, it has never been that perfect. We have to live there after all. A house is peopled with people. People make messes, and we can’t be little soldiers, but it made a difference to me to know that I wanted a house of order. It became a priority to make a place where the Spirit of the Lord could come.

Cooking meals for my family took on added meaning because I needed a place to teach and gather and have the Lord’s Spirit there. It was important to invest my effort in making a home.

At one time I was going through some challenges, and one of my daughters came home from school and put another item on my necessary list. I said, “I don’t feel like I’m contributing what I should or what I could,” and she said, “You could smile. Mother, you could smile.” I thought, “That is a great service.” Smiling took on added meaning for me. Being happy around my family and other people was necessary.

I learned some things from the scriptures—that it is necessary to teach my children to pray and walk uprightly before the Lord. Things like family home evening and time recreating with our family became more necessary and more important. I thought more about my husband and supporting him, and I studied Doctrine and Covenants section 25, in which the Lord tells Emma Smith to be a comfort to her husband with consoling words and a spirit of meekness.5 That took on more importance, and it was more necessary to me to be kind to my husband and to support him in his heavy responsibilities. I also learned from that section in verse 10 to “lay aside the 

things of [the] world, and seek for the things of a better,” to not ask him to provide things for me we couldn’t afford but value the things that were important for our family—to “seek for the things of a better” and not be tantalized by “the things of the world” that were glamorous. Becoming self-reliant became more important to me.

I have been reviewing Elder Hales’s words in his talk on provident living and self-reliance about debt.6 When we go into debt, we give away some of our precious, priceless agency and place ourselves in self-imposed servitude. As our freedom is diminished by debt, increasing hopelessness depletes us physically, depresses us mentally, burdens us spiritually. Our self- image is affected, as well as our relationships with our spouse and children, with our friends and neighbors, and ultimately with the Lord.

Becoming self-reliant temporally affects our spiritual self-reliance, and we are going to need to be more temporally self-reliant in the days to come in order to have strong spirits and help the Lord.

Loving one another goes on the necessary list and a few other things. You can make your own list of what is necessary, but there are things that are essential and things that are necessary in order for us to fulfill our responsibilities in the house of Israel and to fulfill our mission.

The third category has to do with the nice-to-do things. Those are crafts and hobbies and recreational reading and movies and travel and lunches with friends. A lot of women call this “time out.” These things won’t save us. They add variety to our lives, but they won’t save us. When our priorities are on that list, and our time is devoted to those nice-to-do things, our priorities are out of order, and we lose power.

To walk with the Lord, we have to know what is essential, what is necessary, and what is nice to do. There is a lot to do, but I find that it is amazing how much I get to do on my nice-to-do list. The Lord blesses us with those mercies, but only if the other priorities are in order."